Girls Night Out VIII: Self-Rescuing Princesses

Posted on Fri Apr 27th, 2018 @ 5:29am by Captain Charybdis MacGregor & Commander Fiona McCray & Lieutenant Commander Selune
Edited on on Fri Apr 27th, 2018 @ 5:29am

0 words; about a 1 minute read

Mission: Operation: Risa!
Location: Risa, Roma Arcology
Timeline: 2265

Princess: From Fedepedia, the Federation encyclopedia

The word "princess" in this instance derives from the French demoiselle, meaning "young lady", and is central to the term "damsel in distress". It is an archaic term not used in modern Federation Standard except for effect or in expressions such as this, which can be traced back to the knight errant of Earth Medieval songs and tales, who regarded the saving of such women as an essential part of his raison d'tre. The helplessness of the damsel in distress, who can be portrayed as foolish and ineffectual to the point of navete, along with her need of others to rescue her, has made the stereotype the target of significant feminist criticism.


"Char, I grew oop with two parents who loved me and my brothers, and they love one another tae bits. I've seen how true love looks... and its a lot of work tae maintain," she said, drifting back into seriousness, "Mum and Da walk taegether every morning and evening when they're no travelin' apart. They still hold hands... and they've been married 50 years!" she shook her head a fond soft smile on her face, "You... you deserve some oov thet happily ever after."

"By Caitian standards," Selune quietly added, "you two would barely be considered friends, from what I've seen... he barely speaks to you. You're closer to the entire rest of the crew than him it seems."

"Aye," Fi nodded in agreement. "Listen tae the Kitty, the kitty is wise."

Looking at them both a bit askew, Char considered what they had said. "I guess... we don't really spend any time together outside of his quarters... and I assume he is in meetings or something and then we spend our time together, but... I am always meeting with the crew, and running errands around the ship until we get together, and then..."

"Tell him thet you need and deserve more... not joost more sex, but romance and companionship an appreciation. Or joost assign him the position oov bed buddy and safeguard yer heart."

Fishing a startlingly dainty hanky out of her bag, Fi handed it to Char. "Yer leaking."

The light that shone in the sensitive science officer's eyes was quite intense indeed. "I really do love happily ever afters... " she said in what might qualify for one of the most obvious statements ever spoken as she dabbed her eyes. "It is kind of a mess, isn't it? I should have considered what I was doing more carefully... but I didn't expect a few, um, factors to come into play, and it... complicated things."

Selune wrinkled her nose slightly with a small frown, "You smell like the pool."

"Well... thet idiot did make a really big splash," Fiona gave a snort of laughter, "when he fell in."

the science officer giggled at that... she was still rather proud of herself for her handling of the situation.

The redhead placed her hand gently on top of that of her friend. "Char, first love is always difficult and it's always wonderful... and heartbreaking at times. Try tae enjoy it boot dinna let him walk over yer heart, okay? Joost because he says he loves ye dinna give him a right ta ignore yuir feelins an treat ye like a servant, an take ye fer granted. I'd wager there's no shortage of captains in the fleet who'd kill to have ye on their bridges, and they know how ta say 'thank ye' fur a job well done."

Nodding slowly, Char ticked off the points. "Be more communicative about my needs, do not just settle for sex as a substitute for intimacy, try harder to like myself and don't fret because people might still like me even if they find out I'm kind of a mo... uhm, a masochist when it comes to relationships..."

"And don't feel like you have to tell us things you don't want to," chipped in Selune, "Unless Fi makes you, and Fiona," she said in mock seriousness, "do try to remember to close doors." Fi nodded in agreement.

"I was leaving it open if you needed something, for Al'thindor's sake!" Char exclaimed in mock exasperation.

"Jay-sus, Mary and Joseph and their little dog Toto too!" Fiona shook her head, "We're grown damned women... I think we can tend tae ourselves at least somewhat. Ye don't have tae take care oov us Char. We are all self-rescuing princesses. You really are allowed tae be off duty ya know."

"I just... I just wanted this weekend to be... perfect, that's all," Char replied weakly. She threw her hands up in the air in exasperation. "Okay, okay, I'll stop... first... officering... captaining... whatever it is that I do is supposed to be called. How about a drink?"

Fiona pulled the flower out of her curls and held it out, "Perfection is overrated. Plumeria flowers all have at least one flaw... does it make them less beautiful or wonderful? No... they're still wonderful, so stop tying yerself intae knots and joost have fun!"

With a bounce Fiona left the bed, then she turned, "A drink sounds guid... what wuid ye like?" Then she made a face at Selune, "Ooooh you might want tae moove in case her head explodes from havin suimone else do somethin' fer her."

A panicked expression flooded across Selune's face as she danced backwards, "Oh god... the mess will be horrible... I'd never get all those green brains out of my hair!"

"Aye... green bluid... white fur," Fiona shuddered. "And you groomed eet so well taeday."

Shaking her head, Char resisted the urge to snap at either of them... particularly since as soon as Fiona had gotten up to offer her one she had been about to refuse and get it herself. "I will have whatever you... no. I would like an Andorian Sunset please, with salt!" She looked inordinately pleased with herself for her choice. She wasn't just going to settle for what was handed to her, she was going to ask for what she wanted.

Fiona applauded then said, "And you, Madame Selune oov the incredibly luxurious fur?"

"Pina colada!" Selune called out clapping excitedly.

The diminutive engineer sashayed towards the bar with a remarkably good imitation of Char's normal catwalk strut, which she recognized and it promptly elicited laughter from the seductress.

"Guess who poot herself through tha Academy tendin' bar," Fiona threw over her shoulder with a toss of her hair.

"I'm amazed that we never ran into each other then... where did you tend bar?" Char asked with a quizzical expression.

"Fast Forward," Fiona said with a grin.

"Wait... that bar in San Francisco where all of the girls dressed as...?"

"Hover racers... aye, we even had a team. I was on tha pit crew!"

"No wonder! I got thrown out of there for fighting the first night they let me back off campus! One of the bartenders grabbed me by the ear to get my drink order because I was talking to some male, and I got banned after I broke her nose!" Charybdis recalled excitedly. "That was the night I stopped going to bars in San Francisco and started traveling Earth to clubhop!"

From the looks of things Fiona still remembered her recipes. She nodded, "Oh... Laird... I'll bet that was Tina, she was a right royal pain in tha arse," she mixed and measured deftly. While the mixtures were chilling she limed and expertly salted the rim of one of the glasses then coated the other one with a dusting of pineapple and coconut sugar.

"Apparently she was dating one of the bouncers, because he was on me in a flash with a taser and he dropped me like a novice. I never even saw him coming... and I never did get a damn drink," she laughed.

"That wuid hae been my brother Bob." Fiona said with a chuckle. "Not too long after that he and Tina broke oop. He finally grew some guid taste" She came back over with the drinks and handed them off to their appropriate owners. "Well... now you have yer drink."

As for herself, Fi plopped back down on the bed with a glass of honey meade.

The green-blooded alien took a moment to look through the drink at the brightly lit sky outside, appreciating the layers of differently colored liquors mixing while still remaining separate, creating a beautiful effect. "It's beautiful... thank you, Fiona." She held it aloft for a toast, and waited for her fellows to join her.

"Here's to us, ladies... to self-rescuing princesses. A knight in shining armor is always nice, but we'll save ourselves quite handily, thankye!" Char offered to the group. The little voice in her head that liked to remind her that she was no princess but a dragon in disguise was cheerfully prepared with a rejoinder, but she ignored it.

"Here, here!" The scot hoisted her own glass in response.

the white-furred Caitan slowly raised her glass to match, "I never understood this custom... here, here?"

Fiona laughed then nodded sagely, "Oh I can explain it to ye..." she leaned in like she was about to share a state secret with the Caitian, "Don't tell anyone... boot... Humans are bluidy strange!"

Both of her cohorts were still leaning in anxiously, waiting to hear the explanation of the custom. Apparently the joke had been lost on both of them.

"Ah laird." Fiona snorted, "and we have odd senses oov humor too," Selune and Chary looked at one another, nodded in agreement, then looked back at Fiona expectantly.

"Tough room," Fiona laughed. For a moment she considered spinning a long elaborate tale about the origin of the toast knowing she could convince them both of its veracity but she just couldn't do it to her two friends.

"That's it... Humans have odd customs that make no sense to anyone... not even them."

"Here... here?" Selune asked cautiously as she raised her glass again.

Fiona laughed "Here, here!"

"Cheers! To human customs that make no sense, yet the galaxy is overrun with them so we adapt to their nonsensical customs!" It had sounded better in her head, but Charybdis ran with it anyway.

"We're a pushy lot," Fiona agreed cheerfully.

"But we love you for it," Char said with a smile and sipped her drink again. "This is really very good, by the way... thank you." She sipped it once more, then exclaimed, "I can't believe it was your brother that tazed me... it really is a small galaxy!"

"Well you kin kick him in that go-nads when ye come fer a visit wi' tha folks if he's there," Fiona chuckled. "He's not me favorite brother reet now, and really, he shouldna be breedin."

"Oh, it was fair... I did break her nose, after all, and if he had given me the chance I would likely have injured him as well, so I'm not mad. And partying across the globe paid off for me quite handily... I saw a lot of Earth because of that resolution he helped establish. So no gnards boot for him, unless he tries it again," the cheerful commander intoned. She had apparently missed the part about visiting Fiona's folks.

"Maybe I should have tried partying instead of borrowing shuttlecraft," Selune pondered wistfully before slowly sipping at her drink, "Seems to make for more interesting stories."

"Pfft I pretty mooch worked and studied," Fiona said with a sigh, "Had to keep me grades oop bein tha 6th one through it was either do or die."

The Vulcan vixen laughed cheerfully at that... obviously her mercurial mood had improved. "I was the terror of the Academy... most demerits of any cadet to ever successfully graduate right here. I would read all of the textbooks the first week, commit them to memory, do all of the assignments and hand in anything from the syllabus in advance and then sit through the classes and ask stupid or smartassed questions if the instructors were tools, or be quiet and sleep in the back and stay out of the way if they were good teachers."

"Then on weekends I would do whatever I could to get transporter chits and beam away and adventure for the weekend, getting back in time for first class Monday." Char sighed wistfully, "I didn't have any friends, but I had adventures, that was for certain, and I saw so very many places..."

Suddenly Fiona sat up and clapped her hands, "YOU!!!!! You were in Dougal's comparative physics class tha first year he taught! He was a junior professor, really. You gave him fits!"

"He said ye were bluidy brilliant when he managed tae get ye tae open yer mouth, but for the life of him he couldna get ye to participate in inny of the group discussions or the projects!"

"Dougal... Dougal McCray? Dear Judas at a hot dog stand, he's your brother too?" The science officer put her face into her palm. "Unbelievable. He was a good instructor, he knew the material and his teaching style was to lead the students to intuit the answers, not to club over the head with the data or to try to intimidate with technical jargon. Of course I was brilliant, I read all of his doctoral research in the second week of class. He's brilliant, he taught me, ergo."

"Oh laird, dinna tell Dougal he's brilliant. His head barely fits through tha front door as is..."

"Did I mention thet my parents really loove one another and they took tae heart the phrase 'go forth and multiply'?" Fiona laughed, "I'm tha only girl and that youngest oov 6- would have been 8 boot Mum and Da lost two oov tha lot tae... well.. They were on a ship called tha Hesperus durin' a pirate attack and the school level got hit."

"They thought Bob was tha end oov tha line boot they went on a 10th honey moon and 9 months later... TA-DAH!"

"Awwwww... that's so sweet, though!" Charybdis offered with a small smile. "I'd love to have a family... I mean, uh, to start one and have children. I'm glad your parents had so many children then... because that gave us you!" Char raised her drink in a toast. "Even if Dougal's transwarp theory is rubbish as it is... has a few sound principles but his math is all just there to support itself and it doesn't actually work. Toss that one at him next time you talk to him... is he still single and stuttering around breasts?"

"No. He's married and has a small brood oov egg heads now. I imagine he got oover his stuttering after a bit." Fiona laughed, "He's tha shy one, Angus and Harry are tha rakes, Wallace is that sweet one and Bob believe it oor not is tha' peacemaker."

"Well, he did taze me instead of hitting me with a chair, so I'd believe it," the vixen chuckled. "And Dougal didn't usually stutter, just when I tugged down on my top a little. So what was it like growing up with so many siblings around? Was it fun? Did you have lots of adventures together? Is it nice having a big family?" Char looked genuinely fascinated by the concept.

Fiona chuckled, "I was tha' youngest by 6 years... I pretty mooch joost followed them around gettin' under foot. Aye...it was fun and I wuidna trade them fer tha world, boot they're a fine lot of busy bodies. Nary a one oov them is content tae leave me be." The engineer really had no idea how close to her family tree she'd fallen, "And bossy... laird!"

Finally finishing her drink Selune slowly pushed herself away from the seat that was threatening to swallow her whole, "Well, I don't know about you two but I plan to go get ready for tonight. Try not to drink too much."

"Ah yes! What is tha dress code, oh hostess with tha' mostest?" Fi asked.

"SO glad you asked! The code, ladies, is dress to kill. Males wear pants and flat soled shoes- not us. Loose fitting and comfortable is not what draws the male eye! We take no prisoners, we show off the curves that Starfleet training and a good diet and genetics have given us, and we appeal to a broad range of tastes across the boards... which means that between the four of us, one of us is bound to catch the eye of every male in the place wherever we go. We pay for no drinks, we dance with whomever we want and we wait in no lines to enter anywhere we please. Tonight we rule in Rome!"

Fiona fell face first on to Char's bed with a Shakespearean sigh,"'High heels?' 'Slinky dresses or frou frou?' 'shiny bits?' 'Make up?' 'and hair thet's had muir than a brush and a wash?'" With each affirmative she got she let out a groan or a wail.

Poor Selune's groan wasn't far behind Fi's as she spoke up, "Shoes? Make up? And you suggest that I only ever brush and wash my hair? I'm hurt!"

The bed muffled the Scot's laughter, "Well ye kin probably forgo the makeup... lucky thing... probably tha' shoes too and be charming, boot you have tae deck oot with baubles and bangles joost like we poor hair impaired types. You know your fur is purrrrrfection."

"Yes indeed... I expect for all of us to take advantage of Fiona's bounteous collection of baubles and bangles to bedeck ourselves in finery that advertises that we are, in point of fact, princesses... visiting dignitas who will not be impressed by your money. Something reasonably loud and ostentatious I think... at least a necklace or choker."

"But... what aboot comfort?"

Charybdis smiled her most maternal smile, and laid her hand delicately over Fiona's. "Oh... oh sweety... comfort is for times like now, when we are here alone together and enjoying one another's company. This... this is war. Our looks are our weapons... we have our wits and charm and guile, tis true, but our beauty be our weapons, and we show them that we are fierce and hungry and dangerous!" The gleam in her eye was... unsettling.

"There goes my plans for that robe..." Selune pouted quietly.

"Save it for the bedroom, kitten. Tonight you prowl and hunt, and that slender figure of yours are your claws, not some shapeless robe!" Char paused, then relented a bit. "Come on, seriously, it'll be fun! You can watch guys walk into walls because they are staring at you!"

"No sweats either?"

The scientist's eyes narrowed briefly before she grabbed Fiona gently by the throat and began mock strangling her. "I WILL KILL YOU TINY HUMAN I SWEAR I WILL...!" she giggled through gritted teeth.

"Thanks Fi, take one for the team while I seek safety in my room!" Selune called out as she fled the scene of what could only be considered a crime in progress.

"Help... help... Sure... she looks like a cat but tastes like... chicken!" Fiona hammed it for all it was worth. "Traitor!"

"Chicken...?" Char dropped Fiona like a bad habit and began prowling across the bed predatorily towards the departed feline. "It has been a few hours since lunch..."

"Caitian... The other white meat!" Fi called from her prone position, "You'd better run Kitty!!! Run... RUN like the wind Simba" A ritzy faux oxford voice came from the redhead but she didn't bother moving from her comfortable flop as she belted out, "Booooorn Free, as free as the wind blows..."

For some reason Fiona at least seemed to find that outrageously funny.

 

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